People will believe what they want to believe, even if they know the contrary to be true. Terry Goodkind’s masterpiece Wizards First Rule clearly explains a concept that should be common sense. But common sense is not common, and after this life changing revelation marinated a little, I realized there is much to learn. Humility was the first challenge. If my ego was blinding perception, what was it doing to observation?
When talking to people, try to identify why they are talking to you. There is a reason, or else a conversation would not be taking place. The benefit or intention of the interaction is not necessarily for a good or bad reason. A few of the reasons people talk:
- Spend time with someone.
- Share an experience.
- Give or receive information.
- Express friendship or love.
- Waste time.
- Release stress, frustration, or tension.
- Achieve an objective.
Communication is happening for a reason, and understanding why it is happening will help to make it more productive.
Identification of Crazy
Have you ever been a part of a conversation where you felt the other person was dancing in candy-land in their head? No matter what fact you provided, it was wrong and there was no changing it. Fact after fact, resources provided with professional backing, and still the other person will just not listen. Unfortunately you were not part of a conversation. You were either being recruited to a cause or a belief in their knowledge. You were the audience and they were on stage ranting, raving, or issuing the gospel of their point.
How to benefit from crazy
Instead of allowing frustration to build and anger-based comments ruin a relationship, try to receive a benefit from the situation. If there is no benefit, try to break away in a non-confrontational way, while still maintaining whatever relationship or integrity you have. Some of the ways to benefit from crazy:
- Guide the conversation to receive information worth your time.
- Try to see the other person’s point of view to get a better understanding of who they are.
- Ask questions that will help them see alternatives.
Guide the conversation
Without manipulating, if you steer the conversation to receive information or something of value, your time is not being wasted. By making the interaction valuable, it will be easier and more enjoyable to engage with that person in the future.
Try to see the other person’s point of view
By understanding more about the person, greater understanding of what they are sharing may be acquired. Also, if the person is speaking for a different reason, it may help in ease a painful experience. If they are just relieving stress, helping another person may make you feel better about the time you are spending.
Ask questions that will help them see alternatives
When someone will not listen to opposing facts, questions may help them to think about the situation differently. Asking about how that relates to something else, allowing them to think about an option, when a statement may be ignored.
Crazy time concluded….
Sometimes, there is no talking sense to crazy. Find another benefit if possible from the interaction. Learn what you can, even if it does not relate to the conversation. Practice communication tactics to benefit from your valuable time. And let crazy go on their happy way feeling they have achieved whatever goal intended.
So the Sword of Truth fans do not hunt me down
Taken from sword-of-truth.com
Wizard’s First Rule:
“People are stupid; given proper motivation, almost anyone will believe almost anything. Because people are stupid, they will believe a lie because they want to believe it’s true, or because they?re afraid it might be true. Peoples? heads are full of knowledge, facts and beliefs, and most of it is false, yet they think it all true. People are stupid; they can only rarely tell the difference between a lie and the truth, and yet they are confident they can, and so are all the easier to fool.”
(Chapter 36, Page #397 US Hard Cover)